Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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