I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
