Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
