thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
