Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
well you can't waste a boner
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
