Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
