Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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