out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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