i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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