i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize