i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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