just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
