butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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