What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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