you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
