Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
You've changed since you got that strap on
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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