There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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