Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
