i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
