so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
