Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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