chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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