i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
