Screwed.edu
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
