I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
