trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
