He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
