Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
