I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
