he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
false alarm, still single
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
