I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize
