im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
