we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
She bit a glass in half.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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