You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
