we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
