I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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