How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
