so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
