it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
