actually, I'm a sock model
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
