I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
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