last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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