so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
