I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
