Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
