New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Randomize
