So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
