with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
