Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
