The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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